E-Mail to Wade

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Dictator]
From: [Resigning]
Subject: Signs

So, basically what you're saying is I'm Stupid x 21?

KF

Comments

[x-deadpool.livejournal.com]

To: [Smartest Minion]
From: [Damn It]


No. I'm saying when I'm stupid you should smack me with a sign.

WWW

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Badly Worded]
From: [Former Minion, remember?]

Oh. Okay that makes more sense now. Your power of written speech needs work.

KF

[x-deadpool.livejournal.com]

To: [Please Don't Leave?]
From: [We Can Make This Work]


Usually I don't suck quite this bad. Every benevolent dictator needs someone to take 'em down a few pegs. Remind 'em they're only partially human. What can I do to repair our leader-minion relationship?

WWW

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [You sound like a girlfriend]
From: [Apparently dumping you]

For one, there needs to be a harem. It doesn't have to be mine, it can be yours but I need access to a harem. And possibly a kitten dyed purple. And boiled peanuts. Minion status shall be held hostage until demands are met!

KF

[x-deadpool.livejournal.com]

To: [Young & Feisty]
From: [You Asked For It]


Whenever you want it, I've got a flight ready for you to Borneo. The Sultan of Brunei owes me a couple favors and he's got a harem like you would not believe. I can hook you up. I'm not sure how I feel about the ethical ramifications of dying kittens purple, but we'll work on it.

WWW

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Surprisingly Harem-ready]
From: [Re-enlisted]

You can just dip a white kitten in purple kool-aid. It's nontoxic and tasty when the cat tries to clean it off. It just...doesn't really come off. Well, it might stain stuff purple when she lays on it.

Why would the Sultan of Brunei owe you favors?

KF

[x-deadpool.livejournal.com]

To: [You Doubted Me?]
From: [Pleased As Punch]


I don't mind purple stuff. It's finding a kitten to dye. But I'm on it.

I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill you.

WWW