Text to Doug

[xp_darcy]

[1] Why did the mansion security alert start going off on my phone?
[2] Are you okay?

Comments

[xp_cypher]

(1) Some kind of mansion intruder
(2) Threw a stove at me and Kyle in the kitchen
(3) So then we were kinda busy with fire suppression
(4) No injuries tho
(5) Guess the intruder might not be a threat?
(6) idk, got the all clear stand down a little while after
(7) but there is shit ton of property damage

[xp_darcy]

[1] Glad you're okay
[2] Do you wanna just like.. bounce for Crimmas with us tomorrow?

{Several minutes later}
[1] WHAT DO YOU MEAN A STOVE
[2] AND FIRE SUPPRESSION

[xp_cypher]

(1) Giving it strong consideration at least.
(2) So many broken windows.
(3) Intruder had TK, threw it at me and Kyle to get past us
(4) Shit aim, but it tore the gas hoses
(5) So she got past to Clinto and whoever else was there
(6) And Kyle and I put out the fires

[xp_darcy]

[1] If so pack us bags and we will pick you up
[2] Foggy wore Matt out he has no idea any of this happened yet
[3] TORE THE GAS HOSES that fucking idiot is lucky they didn't blow all of you sky high
[4] For Thor's sake
[5] I am also lucky they did not manage to blow y'all up

[xp_cypher]

(1) So apparently she's sixteen, which explains the Poor Life Decisions part
(2) I apparently got 'voluntold' by Kyle to help with cleanup so yaaaaaaaaaay for that /s
(3) "For Thor's sake" about sums it up.

[xp_darcy]

[1] Oh yay, more destructive children. 🙃
[2] Well, you still have to sleep so offer is open and lbr you deserve a small vacation.
[3] Seriously I can get us tickets to my Gran's.
[4] Did my room get damaged because uh... if so I will definitely not be back until I can contact Forge about repairs. I don't care how pissy that makes people.
[5] I deserve to feel safe when I sleep and that's like the only way to even minimally do it.

[xp_cypher]

(1) She came in through the hall and kitchen and then down into the sensitive areas
(2) no damage to living quarters that I'm aware of and I already checked yours
(3) tickets to gran's sounds kinda nice tbh

Several minutes later:

(1) OMG I found the funniest goddamn thing
(2) was looking for weird vodka to gift to Clinto
(3) and I found OLD BAY vodka
(4) with a tag on it that says "spirit of the Bay"

[xp_darcy]

[1] Cool, cool, I still can't believe the whole kitchen
[2] Getting contractors out at Christmas lmaoooooooo not happening
[3] Matt's gonna stay with Foggy and the uncles but seriously
[4] You wanna bail, say yes and pack the two of us a week of casual and comfortable winter wear
[5] I'll get us tickets, inform the family, and come get you

Follow up:
[1] GET IT FOR NAMOR
[2] Also hmmmmm get me a bottle for food experiments. And Bloody Marys. Please. :)
[3] Oddka has an electricity flavor

[xp_cypher]

(1) maybe trip to Gran's after Crimmas?
(2) I kinda need to see the look on Namor's face when he unwraps that bottle
(3) ordering three bottles then, one for food science, one for Clinto, one for Namor

[xp_darcy]

[1] You could've just said you didn't want, it's fine.
[2] I can go alone.

[xp_cypher]

(1) Babe. I'm good with going.
(2) I just ALSO really want to see how indignant Namor gets
(3) when he realizes we know about his booty calls

[xp_darcy]

[1] Yeah, not much point in going after christmas, we'd basically get there and leave again
[2] And you know you'll get roped into doing more cleanup and repair
[3] It's fine, Marci said I can just stay in her guest room