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xp_communication2005-04-24 12:30 am
x-cable.livejournal.com) wrote in xp_communication2005-04-24 12:30 am
Emails to Alison and Manuel
To: [firefly]
From: [he of the still-spinning head]
Subject: I could have told you...
...how effective properly-arranged, large amounts of pillows could be. Months ago.
Also. Esther. I know I told you about how much it bothered me, not to know my mother's name. Now I do.
Nathan
To: [Manuel]
From: [Nathan]
Subject: not sure if you have your laptop with you in the Box...
... but whenever you do see this, please try and remember what I said?
I won't ask you again to tell me whether or not it was a request. If for no other reason than the fact that I should be able to figure that out myself. I am a mindreader, after all.
N.
From: [he of the still-spinning head]
Subject: I could have told you...
...how effective properly-arranged, large amounts of pillows could be. Months ago.
Also. Esther. I know I told you about how much it bothered me, not to know my mother's name. Now I do.
Nathan
To: [Manuel]
From: [Nathan]
Subject: not sure if you have your laptop with you in the Box...
... but whenever you do see this, please try and remember what I said?
I won't ask you again to tell me whether or not it was a request. If for no other reason than the fact that I should be able to figure that out myself. I am a mindreader, after all.
N.
Reply
From: [Nathan]
Subject: not weak...
Just not possessed of much in the way of solid ground to stand on right now.
I know you don't believe that I can empathize with your situation, because I never had a family, a culture, or traditions that I was proud of. To some extent you're right; I didn't have those things, and it makes it very difficult for me to really understand why it hurts you to have lost or given it all up.
But I do understand what it is to be building from what seems like nothing. I also know what it's like to do it more than once, to have your life stripped away repeatedly. So long as you're alive, Manuel, there is still the opportunity to rebuild. Even if it means rebuilding yourself into an entirely new person.
N
Re: Reply
To: Dayspring, Nathan
Subject: I don't have the strength
I can't keep fighting it. I just don't have the strength. I have no foundation, no one to lean on, to draw strength from.
It's not so bad down here, underwater
Once you get past the fear, underwater
Manuel
Reply
Given everything that you have survived, I think you need to have more faith in your own strength.
N.