TXT to THE BROS

[xp_hawkeye]

[1/13] Guys, I helped a dude throw some anti-mutant
[2/13] assholes outta Kirby's in DX last night
[3/13] and he's apparently new to the city, I guess.
[4/13] Anyway, name's Sam Guthrie, he's the bartender
[5/13] there and a) I told him some of you guys
[6/13] with connections to the underground fight club
[7/13] would send some friends over to make sure
[8/13] those assholes don't come back but also b)
[9/13] I volunteered us to go hang out with him
[10/13] tomorrow night at the bar. He seems nervous.
[11/13] Like he needs friends. And also, he said
[12/13] he wasn't sure how the 'north' worked
[13/13] so I'm kinda worried.

Comments

[xp_cypher]

(1) Bro. Brobrobrobro. BRO.
(2) Guthrie? Well, guess it's Frankenberry Cat time, wheeeee
(3) At least before, the Guthrie clan
(4) (And it's a definite clan, bc 3 of them were at the mansion)
(5) come from BFE Kentucky, so that 'north' thing tracks
(6) I am absolutely down to throw some assholes out of a place
(7) Just gimme the when and where

[xp_wildchild]

i just landed omg
and you send me this
please at least tell me
he's like not 12
I can't handle if Sam Guthrie's a kid

[xp_cypher]

(1) welcome back, bro?
(2) lmao

[xp_darcy]

Kyle hon, if he's bartending he's at least 21.
Clint, don't you think inflicting all of us on someone nervous at once might make him MORE nervous?
We're a lot. (affectionately)

[xp_cypher]

(1) I mean, Clint's a lot all on his own, babe.
(2) with the misspellings and the freaking 13-text blast blowing up phones
(3) (ilu clinto)

[xp_darcy]

But all of us + Clint + drinks is MORE
I mean I'm down but maybe not everyone at ONCE
Small groups

[xp_hawkeye]

What exactly did I misspell, bro?

[xp_cypher]

in general, bro

[xp_hawkeye]

Since when, bro? Tasha's got me actually using capital letters and everything now.

[xp_cypher]

(1) Because Tasha's terrifying, bro. Smart.
(2) I bet you misspell like a champ after the vodak, tho

[xp_hawkeye]

[1/9] I mean it was more like. Awkward
[2/9] nervous than actual anxiety nervous?
[3/9] Don't get me wrong, he definitely
[4/9] didn't need my help as much
[5/9] as I thought he might when I got
[6/9] involved with the throwing-out.
[7/9] I think it'll be fine. He didn't
[8/9] seem to be having any problems
[9/9] with the crowd at the bar in general.

[xp_darcy]

Maybe introduce us in small doses then because we really are A LOT

[xp_wildchild]

okay good point I have no funny excuse even
I blame uh
this really bad airport novel I read about killer sharks

[xp_darcy]

Long flight and bad airport novels are a great excuse, really.

[xp_hawkeye]

[1/5] Bro. Bro bro bro. BRO.
[2/5] Welcome back! Hope your sabbatical
[3/5] building roofs was great and cathartic and stuff.
[4/5] He's totes not 12. I dunno how old he is but
[5/5] he's cute and also the actual bartender.

[xp_darcy]

"He's cute" *points finger* NO

[xp_hawkeye]

I'm innocent. I have never done anything wrong in my life. Ever.

[xp_cypher]

IKnowThisAndILoveYou dot gif

[xp_darcy]

I know you and I love you. NO.

[xp_wildchild]

my dude no stop hitting on twinks

[xp_hawkeye]

[1/5] Knew I could count on you.
[2/5] Bring Angelo?
[3/5] And also it's at Kirby's in DX.
[4/5] He may or may not be working
[5/5] but we'll make excellent entertainment.

[xp_hawkeye]

[1/5] BROS. Bartender Sam texted me and outed himself
[2/5] by accident cause he thought he was talking to his sister.
[3/5] Do I acknowledge? He texted a few minutes later
[4/5] like 'you didn't see those please and thanks'
[5/5] so I feel like I should be like, 'see what?'

[xp_darcy]

Hmmmmm. You didn't see anything but you're out to your uncles?

[xp_hawkeye]

I have no living uncles.

[xp_darcy]

Dads. Uncles. It's been a long day.

[xp_hawkeye]

Fair. But just because I said he was cute doesn't mean I'm planning to jump his bones.

[xp_darcy]

I know but you also said he looks 12 which means he either ages amazingly or is YOUNG.

[xp_hawkeye]

What? No. I said he was the bartender. Kyle said he wasn't allowed to be 12.

[xp_darcy]

I can't remember shit tonight, maybe I need to follow my own advice to Topaz and get more sleep.
This is Darcy's brain on a week plus of not sleeping adequately, please leave a message after the tone.
Should be getting better soon.

[xp_hawkeye]

[1/4] You know you can sleep in Tasha's room, if you want.
[2/4] She's out of the country at the moment. It's not
[3/4] like Q has a key or anything. I wouldn't let him
[4/4] in while you're here.

[xp_darcy]

Been sleeping in Kevin's.
There's some... I'll text you solo, k?

[xp_cypher]

(1) aw BRO.
(2) sending the wrong text to the wrong person is the W O R S T
(3) play it cool, bro

[xp_hawkeye]

[1/6] Definitely played it cool.
[2/6] Except for then he said he got like
[3/6] halfway blown up so. I basically
[4/6] asked if he had black lung
[5/6] and now I believe he might need
[6/6] a minder.

[xp_cypher]

(1) Bro.
(2) BRO.
(3) Seriously, bro?
(4) Darce's gonna set your ringtone to something absolutely karmic.
(5) You know that, right?

[xp_hawkeye]

Man, I am well aware.

[xp_loa]

[1/2] Jesus Christ 21 texts this is why group texts are a bad idea! I thought someone was dying!!!!

[2/2] Always down to sit at a bar, I’ll see if Fi’s busy

[xp_cypher]

In my defense, Clint brings out my gremlin tendencies.

[xp_hawkeye]

I haven't even given you any vodak!

[xp_darcy]

In Doug's defense, he doesn't need vodak for either of us to bring out his gremlin. Just a little nudge.

[xp_topaz]

[1/6] Who is this?
[2/6] Why is this group called THE BROS?
[3/6] Wait, Barton. Okay that explains a lot
[4/6] Going to have to pass on drinks, it seems like you have enough volunteers
[5/6] I'm no good for nervous people who need friends
[6/6] And I haven't slept in three days

[xp_hawkeye]

Topaz what even. GO TO SLEEP. <3

[xp_topaz]

[1/2] I'm working on it
[2/2] Just need to finish this one thing

[xp_hawkeye]

Mkay, sleep well.

[xp_cypher]

(1) Topaz I swear to crap
(2) THREE DAYS???????????????
(3) Do I need to put you in a fireman carry and take you to Doc Grim?
(4) Three days is when you start hallucinating

[xp_darcy]

Do you need a sleeping aid?
I'm not gonna scold but you know you need to sleep more than that.
Please don't make me give you Kevin's disappointed look.

Reply to Darcy and Doug

[xp_topaz]

I just got caught up on something. I'm heading to bed now

Re: Reply to Darcy and Doug

[xp_darcy]

Cool, but I'm swinging by with some sleepy tea.