Date: 2011-03-13 10:52 pm (UTC)
To: [Meggan]
From: [Kevin]
Subject: Apologies

You ever see me when I'm half awake or when someone has just woken me up and you'll realize Southern is a whole other language in general. You know how I sorta mumble half the time and I'm really soft spoken? It gets worse when I'm not trying to make sure people can understand me through the accent. Multiple word sentences get condensed down to like 3 syllables. Angry/offended/generally miffed Southern = Really, really polite and formal. It's not the only time we're polite and formal, so it's hard for the foreigners to know when we're annoyed or mad at them and when we're just actually being nice. If an older Southern lady ever says "bless your heart" you should insert "but she's dumb as rocks" in after it mentally because that's the gist of it. There's just a whole different use of language in the South. Or at least the parts of the south that aren't filled with displaced yankees and stuff.

P.S. And you'd end up falling on someone's head and it wouldn't be me and then you'd have to explain why you were hiding in the cabinet just so you could throw yourself at me. (And then I'd get more emails about being inappropriate with you, I bet.)
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