E-mail to Ms Frost and Teachers

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

To: [Ms Frost of the venerable Frostists]
CC: [Muppet Yoda]
From: [Roadkill Stew]
Subject: Make up work...?

Ms. Frost, are you gonna be awesome and give me documentaries as part of my make up work while I'm all roadkill-y? 'Cause that would be awesome. And I could probably start that stuff now if you are. You know, when I'm conscious.

-Layla

P.S. Kyle says you are letting him student teach some stuff so I figured I should CC him and stuff.

To: [Mr Guthrie, Herr Wuschelig, Dr. Grey-Summers, Ms Frost]
Cc: [Mr. Yoda]
From: [Layla of the Deathly Whiny Millers]
Subject: Totally useless...again

Dear Teacherly People,

I know Dr Voght and like Mr Haller probably already told you but I'm totally all death warmed over again. I swear I'm not trying to make this like an every month thing because it sucks. But this is like....feeling way worse than it did last time so I don't think I'll be in class as soon as I was last time. But if you can like get me assignments or whatever for like the next month just in case? I'll try to do stuff when I can. Which is totally not now because I am Vampire Girl and daylight (and like light bulb light) is tooootally not my friend yet. So reading? Bad idea. (You know...when I actually read for your classes ... >.>)

-Layla

Comments

[x-adrienne.livejournal.com]

To: [Vampire Girl]
CC: [Shoeless Joe]
From: [Ms Frost of the venerable Frostists]

Subject: re: Make up work...?

Miss Miller,

I wouldn't want to sully my reputation of being awesome, so yes, there is another documentary you may watch in lieu of readings. If you feel up to starting it now I'll have your roommate run the film and the assignment outline up to you.

And yes, Mr. Gibney will be sitting in on the class so it is very thoughtful of you to include him on the email.

Wishing you a speedy recovery,

A. Frost.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

To: [Ms Frostist]
CC: [Yodaness]
From: [Roadkill Vampire]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

Ms Frost,

Thanks! That's awesome. Yeah, send it with Maddie? She can leave it on my head like my totally awesome new shirt. Which I will show you when I can like move again. 'Cause I think you'd totally dig it for the smartassery.

Hey, I made my own peanut butter to make him cookies! I am totally thoughtful with Yoda!

-Layla

P.S. There are no good synonyms for Frost, btw. Hoarfrost sounds like derogatory and everything else is lame. And you're not made of ice cream so the Frosty thing ala Wendy's is so not fitting. You smile too much to be an Ice/Snow Queen. All snowflake options are just...no. You need a nickname, damn it! I'm totally gonna figure one out eventually though.

[x-adrienne.livejournal.com]

To: [Roadkill Vampire]
CC: [Shoeless Joe]
From: [Ms Frost of the venerable Frostists]

Subject: re: Make up work...?

Miss Miller,

I am a great fan of smartassery, this has been well-established.

You made your own peanut butter?

I would protest that I do not, in fact, need a nickname, but I have a feeling that resistance would be futile so I'll just say that my older sister already covets the title of Ice/Snow Queen anyway.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

To: [Her Frostness of the honorable Frostists]
CC: [Herr Yoda of the Muppety Jedi]
From: [Cannibal Roadkill]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

Ms. Frost,

You will love my ninja present, then!

Yeah. It's not that hard. Yoda's like deathly allergic to anything that is vaguely processed or preservatived or something so I wanted to make sure the scary redhead or Dr Grey wouldn't kill me for landing him in medlab,

I told you, you smile too much. Maybe I can use that. No...grill just doesn't work here. I don't think you're OG enough for a grill.

Layla

[x-wildchild.livejournal.com]

To: [Owner of the Frost Wonder Theme Park]
CC: [wo de ma]
From: [Yoda]

Not like death allergic, just I can't digest most of it. Homemade peanut butter is badass. And you can do cool stuff to it like add bananas or marshmallows easier than the stuff from the tubs at the TJ's.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

To: [Mister Muppet]
CC: [Is there a Frost Widow instead of a Black Widow rollercoaster?]
From: [Wo de Ma]

Why would you put marshmallows in peanut butter? That just seems wrong.

[x-wildchild.livejournal.com]

To: [Owner of the Frost Wonder Theme Park]
CC: [wo de ma]
From: [Yoda]

It's tasty. So is peanut butter and those tiny little oranges.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

To: [YodaMuppet]
CC: [Frostcoaster]
From: [Wo de Ma]

Mandarins? Or tangerines? Also, that's just weird. Marshmallows are for s'mores and hot chocolate. Ooooh I want hot chocolate now. Why do i not have servant people to fetch me things?! WOE! Woe is meeeeee! I just like peanut butter on apples. Or celery. Or bread. Or spoon.

[x-adrienne.livejournal.com]

To: [Cannibal Roadkill]
CC: [Shoeless Joe]
From: [Frost Wonder Themepark]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

Frostcoaster sounds like something Coors or some other beer company invented...

Also, mandarins and marshmallows are great on a peanut butter sandwich.

Also, what does OG mean?

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

To: [WonderFrost the Amazing Frostbite of JUSTICE!]
CC: [Rock the Muppet]
From: [Made of meat]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

No more Frostcoaster. I might like WonderFrost. It's like wholesome like wonderbread while totally sounding like a psychadelic drug that makes you think you're in a ...thing that I can't think of the word for. You know, the balls filled with water with a little scene or whatever that's in them and you shake it up and it snows? Those things.

OG = Original Gangsta. It's not your fault, Ms Frost. You're really white and totally not from the hood.

[x-adrienne.livejournal.com]

To: [Aren't We All Made of Meat, Technically?]
CC: [Fake It Til You Make It]
From: [Wonder...whaaaaaat?]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

If you start calling me WonderFrost the Amazing Frostbite of JUSTICE I'm fairly certain the other teachers will require you go for drug testing on a regular basis, just so you know...

You mean a snowglobe? Or a ball for Zorbing?

Well, as long as it's not my fault!

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

To: [You are so reference ignorant! This is tragic!]
CC: [I think maybe he should be Animal instead of Yoda. For the spastic]
From: [Zombies for JUSTICE!]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

If they don't try to get me drug tested now nothing will convince them I'm high. I think I should totally call you WonderFrost. WonderFrost: Psychedelic for a chillax world. And your Dark Side is Frostbite: Bitch from the 'Hood. Frostbite'll cut you.

SNOWGLOBE! Yes! That thing. What's a Zorbing?

Also: Your whole family is made of meat (http://www.qwantz.com/comics/comic2-531.png). (Clicky the linky, yo)

[x-adrienne.livejournal.com]

From: [Internet References DO NOT COUNT!]
CC: [He's Definitely an Animal, Yes!]
To: [If You Only Put This Much Energy Into Your Schoolwork...]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

Well, as long as you recognize that I could cut you...

Zorbing is harnessing yourself into a big globe-beach-ball type thing like this (http://www.zorbingwales.co.uk/wp-content/gallery/zorbing/zorbing-012.jpg) and being launched down a hill:


You see, it's links like these that make my friends think I need an intervention.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

To: [Schoolwork isn't this entertaining Ms WonderFrost!]
CC: [YodaAnimal]
From: [Necromancer of Names!]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

Could, but you won't. Because you're WonderFrost and I totally don't invoke the wrath of the Frostbite. Besides, that bitch be craaaaazy.

OMGIWANNADOIT!!!!!!!!!!

But it's funny! Why do you need an intervention for funny?

[x-adrienne.livejournal.com]

To: [How Have You Not Passed Out Yet?]
CC: [ShoelessAnimal]
From: [My Friday Nights Used To Be A Lot Different]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

Do I switch between these identities by going into a phone booth at all? How do you know when Frostbite is going to replace WonderFrost? Or is it just when I'm angry because you wouldn't like me when I'm angry?

How did I know you were going to say that? They only have zorbing facilities in Amesbury, Massachusetts and at Ski Roundtop in Pennsylvania in the Northeast, nothing in New York. But I'll look into a group field trip during the next Parents Weekend maybe?

Possibly because funny's rather a new thing for me and my friends are confused and frightened by the change...

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

To: [Clearly you need to snort some WonderFrost and go out and party...but that could be awkward]
CC: [ShoelessMuppet?]
From: [Intermittent Napper]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

You get shorter and younger. Like Mr Hyde. (You should totally point out to Mr Guthrie I obviously read some stuff sometimes...when it doesn't suck.) No phone booths. You get angry and then crazy and then you get all femme fatale and evil and you cut some bitches.

Yessssss! Which one's closer? Where's Amesbury? Maybe that one's closer. I want to hurtle down a hill in a ball! OMG that would be amaaaaazing!

Are they worried you've got new triggers for morphing into Frostbite? Are they worried about their balls with all that cutting going on?

[x-adrienne.livejournal.com]

To: [Hope You Powered Yourself Down To Get Some Sleep Last Night]
CC: [ShoelessMuppet]
From: [Yeah That Would Be Seven Kinds Of Weird There]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

I will certainly point that out to him on your behalf. So I'm basically like a cross between Jekyll/Hyde and that Nikita character Doug introduced me to?

Amesbury's on the southwestern tip of Massachusetts, about four hours from us with no traffic. Ski Roundtop is about the same time and distance in the opposite direction. In Pennsylvania you zorb on a ski hill but I can't find out how long the track actually is. Amesbury it's at something called the Sports Park where the track is 800 feet long. Both places also do a water zorb where they throw water in the ball with you so you can slip and slide as you go down the hill.

Yes, they are most definitely worried about their balls and the cutting going on.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

To: [WonderFrost: Supplier of Psychedelic Looooove]
CC: [ShoelessMuppet]
From: [I'm practically narcoleptic!]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

Maybe? I never watched Nikita. Looked kinda lame. But basically, bad ass with a knife and like no patience and Mr Hyde. Only...um, not a dude. Because, whoa, is Frostbite turns you into a guy that's really weird.

Slip and slide ball? O.O Dude that is awesome! Ski hill is probably steeper or whatever and that seems like more fun? Maybe? But if it's short then that sucks. It's probably like the kiddie ski hill for kids learning to snowboard and shit.

Because they're smart. And/or because they are dudes and dudes are obsessed with their balls. These are the things you learn in public school.

[x-adrienne.livejournal.com]

To: [Should We Outfit You With A Helmet, Then?]
CC: [ShoelessMuppet]
From: [Always Read And Follow The Label]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

Clearly I should come with a warning label if I turn people into guys...

I can call and ask them how long the track is when they open in the spring. Also, they have two tracks at the ski hill rather than the one in Massachusetts. I think it would be the kiddie hill, yes. The slope needs to be pretty gentle from what I understand.

I know public school has taught *me* many, many things, yes!

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

To: [Thinks I take the short bus]
CC: [ShoelessMuppet]
From: [Walks around with pillows strapped to head]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

Whoa! You would need like a big ass blinking sign. I meant Frostbite was your male alter ego, like you were the one turning into a dude.

But I wanna go down the black diamond or whatever the super elite tracks are called. IN A BALL!

You went to public school? I thought you were all like 90210 rich growing up and shit?

[x-adrienne.livejournal.com]

To: [Better Than Having Them Strapped Somewhere Else!]
CC: [ShoelessMuppet]
From: [Only Thinking Of Your Safety]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

Apologies, I misunderstood. I thought I was a psychedelic drug which was why I thought I turned people into guys?

I'll see if Roundtop will allow this but I wouldn't get your hopes up.

I taught in one very briefly when I was first certified as an educator. Back in the time when dinosaurs roamed the earth, of course!

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

To: [Safety Instructor]
CC: [Shoeless Muppet]
From: [Where else would I strap them?]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

Nooo. Well, you might make people think they're guys. 'Cause, you know, psychedelic. Frostbite: Chick with a Dick...from the Hood. Only that was too weird even for me so we revised back to Frostbite: Bitch from the Hood...she'll cut you.

What if I pout at them? Or what if I get someone effective to pout at them? Like Molly.

Did they segregate the herbivores and carnivores to make sure no one got eaten in school?

[x-adrienne.livejournal.com]

To: [Ask Anyone Who's Been Shot In The Tucchus]
CC: [Shoeless Muppet]
From: [Does That Come With A Badge?]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

The second one is much more me, yes.

I'm sure if you all pout at them they will be unable to resist.

Not quite. The herbivores were fine in a classroom altogether but each carnivore had to be segregated separately because they'd try to eat each other if they were all together.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

To: [Wow...you said "tucchus"]
CC: [ShoelessMuppet]
From: [Girl giving you the ugly orange traffic vest]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

I dunno, if Artie pouts at someone they totally won't give us our way. out of spite.

That sounds tense. Now I know why people are all down on public school. They think we eat each other there! Did anyone inform people the dinosaurs weren't in class anymore?

[x-adrienne.livejournal.com]

To: [Do I Get A Sign Or A Flag To Go With It?]
CC: [ShoelessMuppet]
From: [I Don't Want To Be A Bad Influence Using Bad Words]
Subject: re: Make up work...?

Out of spite? Why do you say that?

Do you mean because we segregated them, or do you mean that public school students no longer eat one another because there are no more dinosaurs (except the ones teaching)?