Email to Kyle

[x-emplate.livejournal.com]

After this email.

To: [Perhaps able to straighten this out]
From: [The entirely bemused]
Subject: Remind me . . .

So, I have this morning been informed that I am responsible for the impregnation of Jen. I find this curious, as I feel certain I would remember.

Comments

[x-wildchild.livejournal.com]

To: [Is bemused like amused only with bees?]
From: [The nose knows]
Subject: Yeah, about that.

Dogs - pregnant. Hamsters - pregnant maybe. Jennie? Not. Not unless you did it in the last like, two days and she got really really pregnant really fast and is gonna have an alien baby. And you'd have to have done it as a ghost, since you guys don't smell like sexy time.

Course, knowing this place, you might wanna check that. Maybe she got YOU pregnant.

[x-emplate.livejournal.com]

To: [Yes, Kyle. It is as unto laughing, frolicking bees]
From: [Hence why you were chosen as a reliable source]
Subject: Thought as much

Yes, considerable though my prowess may be I see no point to progress to the point where no physical contact is necessary for intercourse to transpire. Primarily because that rather defeats the purpose. Kindly speak not of alien babies. I have the disturbing impression that once invoked we may find ourselves under seige. If this comes to pass and Jen complains, rest easy in the knowledge that I will be resting sole blame upon you.

You know, I do believe any public announcements can wait until such a time as she returns to clear it herself. It's far more amusing.

[x-wildchild.livejournal.com]

To: [Bees can frolic?]
From: [Glad to be of service.]

So you haven't blessed Jennie with your holy spirit and caused her to birth Our Lord and Savior BabyBoyStarvos? (Hey, did you know for the first four weeks of my life, I was Baby Boy Clarke? I wasn't even a Gibney! WTF, man?)

You guys should demand a non-baby-shower. With presents and food unsuitable for kids.