A letter to Betsy
Jul. 24th, 2013 03:40 amA handwritten letter slipped under Betsy's door several days after an intense fight.
Hey, Betts.
I didn't think I would be able to catch you again, at least not physically, so I'm giving this a try. If nothing else there's no chance it ends with us yelling at each other.
I stand by some of what I said, but I shouldn't have said it like that. I understand why you did what you did. You couldn't help yourself, so you tried to help someone else - to keep the burden from me. As much as I hate that you made that choice and as wrong as I think it was I can't be angry at something you did out of love. It's who you are. It's part of why I love you.
So I can do one of two things: sit around hurt and angry, or think about what I know.
I felt your mind when I took you down to the Medlab. All of it, for the first time in a long time. I know you're terrified of what's been happening to you, and that to spare me you've been holding yourself back for a year. I know that even though we've been together you've spent all that time feeling alone. Despite everything you said, I know that you love me.
I know I love you. Whether one or both of us is broken doesn't and never will change that. And whether you believe it or not, I know I am better for being with you.
What you've been going through has taken its toll. It has for me, too. But we've already spent so much time fighting ourselves - we don't need to fight each other, too.
If you really don't want to be together anymore . . . that's okay. I can't force that on you. I don't want to. But you should know that I'm not going anywhere. You were there for me after my breakdown, and Genosha, and D.C. It's my turn to be there for you. That's my choice to make. Whatever happens, you won't be alone.
I love you.
Jim
Hey, Betts.
I didn't think I would be able to catch you again, at least not physically, so I'm giving this a try. If nothing else there's no chance it ends with us yelling at each other.
I stand by some of what I said, but I shouldn't have said it like that. I understand why you did what you did. You couldn't help yourself, so you tried to help someone else - to keep the burden from me. As much as I hate that you made that choice and as wrong as I think it was I can't be angry at something you did out of love. It's who you are. It's part of why I love you.
So I can do one of two things: sit around hurt and angry, or think about what I know.
I felt your mind when I took you down to the Medlab. All of it, for the first time in a long time. I know you're terrified of what's been happening to you, and that to spare me you've been holding yourself back for a year. I know that even though we've been together you've spent all that time feeling alone. Despite everything you said, I know that you love me.
I know I love you. Whether one or both of us is broken doesn't and never will change that. And whether you believe it or not, I know I am better for being with you.
What you've been going through has taken its toll. It has for me, too. But we've already spent so much time fighting ourselves - we don't need to fight each other, too.
If you really don't want to be together anymore . . . that's okay. I can't force that on you. I don't want to. But you should know that I'm not going anywhere. You were there for me after my breakdown, and Genosha, and D.C. It's my turn to be there for you. That's my choice to make. Whatever happens, you won't be alone.
I love you.
Jim