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Jul. 1st, 2004 05:19 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
x-shinobi.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
xp_communicationTo: Xavier, Charles
CC: Samson, Leonard
From: Shaw, Shinobi
Subject: At least my insomnia is productive.
Sir(s),
The full weight of recent events has finally had a chance to sink into my admittedly-thick skull, thanks to a night of insomnia giving me hours of nothing to do but actually think. I've come to a number of conclusions, but they can all really be traced back to one thing, which is why I'm e-mailing you.
I need help.
When I was brought to this school, I failed to grasp the opportunities it was giving me - primarily, the chance to be a better man, and to change my life into one I would be proud to lead, rather than the one I was raised in. Rather than rise to meet this opportunity, I have sunk even further than I imagined I possibly could, with more than one life lost due to my stubbornly rose-tinted tunnel-vision.
I failed you, Professor, on a monumental level, as well as everyone else here who ever put an iota of faith in me. For that, I hope you will believe me when I say I truly am sorry. I need help, so I can be the person I want to be, someone you, and I, and everybody else can be proud of. Someone we can trust. I want to recognize the face I see when I look in the mirror in the morning. Or.. no, I want to cast a better reflection. I'm not changing back into a good person, I'm turning into one. Bloody metaphors.
I'm having trouble writing this.. I'd probably do better with speaking. If you have time sometime soon, Professor, I've already contacted Doctor Samson about an appointment, but could I come and see you?
-Shinobi Shaw
P.S.: I've been keeping up with the writing Doctor Samson asked me to do in our first session, and did quite a bit of it last evening. If you'd like copies, Professor, and think they might help, you need only ask, and I'll bring them to you as quickly as I can.
---
To: Dayspring, Nathan
From: Shaw, Shinobi
Subject: You were right.
What you told me outside of medlab, just after they brought Sarah in, about how it's easier to deal with the crisis itself than it is everything after? Truer words have never been spoken.
Couldn't sleep last night, which means that everything has had a chance to actually sink in for the first time since.. well, since Emma and Pete brought me here from Paris, actually. That's a lot of bloody sinking, for the record. My head hurts.
I need a shower, and some food. And maybe an ear and a firm "I told you so, you little schmuck", if you're available for it.
I need help.
-Shinobi
CC: Samson, Leonard
From: Shaw, Shinobi
Subject: At least my insomnia is productive.
Sir(s),
The full weight of recent events has finally had a chance to sink into my admittedly-thick skull, thanks to a night of insomnia giving me hours of nothing to do but actually think. I've come to a number of conclusions, but they can all really be traced back to one thing, which is why I'm e-mailing you.
I need help.
When I was brought to this school, I failed to grasp the opportunities it was giving me - primarily, the chance to be a better man, and to change my life into one I would be proud to lead, rather than the one I was raised in. Rather than rise to meet this opportunity, I have sunk even further than I imagined I possibly could, with more than one life lost due to my stubbornly rose-tinted tunnel-vision.
I failed you, Professor, on a monumental level, as well as everyone else here who ever put an iota of faith in me. For that, I hope you will believe me when I say I truly am sorry. I need help, so I can be the person I want to be, someone you, and I, and everybody else can be proud of. Someone we can trust. I want to recognize the face I see when I look in the mirror in the morning. Or.. no, I want to cast a better reflection. I'm not changing back into a good person, I'm turning into one. Bloody metaphors.
I'm having trouble writing this.. I'd probably do better with speaking. If you have time sometime soon, Professor, I've already contacted Doctor Samson about an appointment, but could I come and see you?
-Shinobi Shaw
P.S.: I've been keeping up with the writing Doctor Samson asked me to do in our first session, and did quite a bit of it last evening. If you'd like copies, Professor, and think they might help, you need only ask, and I'll bring them to you as quickly as I can.
---
To: Dayspring, Nathan
From: Shaw, Shinobi
Subject: You were right.
What you told me outside of medlab, just after they brought Sarah in, about how it's easier to deal with the crisis itself than it is everything after? Truer words have never been spoken.
Couldn't sleep last night, which means that everything has had a chance to actually sink in for the first time since.. well, since Emma and Pete brought me here from Paris, actually. That's a lot of bloody sinking, for the record. My head hurts.
I need a shower, and some food. And maybe an ear and a firm "I told you so, you little schmuck", if you're available for it.
I need help.
-Shinobi
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Subject: all right...
Date: 2004-07-01 09:51 pm (UTC)Nathan
Subject: Re: all right...
Date: 2004-07-01 09:54 pm (UTC)Five at the lake it is. Thank you, Nate.
-Shinobi