Email to Jack Leary
Aug. 23rd, 2004 01:10 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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xp_communicationTo: Leary, Jack
From: Dayspring, Nathan
Subject: I'm back
Although I'm guessing Moira's probably let you know that already? She said something about it yesterday, during the hour or so that we were both awake at the same time. If not... I'm back at Xavier's, and thanks to a situation I still don't fully understand, my conditioning is gone. Completely. I'm still not sure what to make of that.
It may take me a while to write this email. Charles has decided I need to fall asleep anytime I get overly emotional or stressed; apparently there was enough psionic damage when the conditioning broke that he thinks that's best for now. It's frustrating. It's like I can't really face what happened, because as soon as I try, I fall asleep. This is why I thought I might try telling you over email. At least then I can stop and start, and you can miss all the intervening naps.
They kidnapped Moira to get me to trade myself for her. We got her out okay, but they triggered my conditioning and I don't really remember what happened after that. Not until I woke up. I've been told it was in Calgary, but I was really unclear about what was going on. They'd drugged me, sedatives and pre-conditioning drugs, and all I could think of was getting away. I did for a while. But there were too many of them... and that was actually my first nap. I think I'm doing well.
I don't remember much else after they took me down the second time. There are some bits and pieces from being back at Mistra, but it's all.... second nap. I'm not supposed to be fighting with the posthypnotic suggestion like that. I think that's the worst of it, what happened there when they went back into my mind. Although being sent back out to kill Charles was bad. Fighting Pete was bad. In fact, most of it was bad... third nap.
Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. I'm not supposed to be fighting the posthypnotic suggestion this hard. Makes me feel all disconnected again, when I try, and I'm having enough trouble remembering that this is real, and I'm not going to wake up back there. I think I really need to talk, though... if I can talk without passing out. I'll have to ask Charles about that.
Nathan
From: Dayspring, Nathan
Subject: I'm back
Although I'm guessing Moira's probably let you know that already? She said something about it yesterday, during the hour or so that we were both awake at the same time. If not... I'm back at Xavier's, and thanks to a situation I still don't fully understand, my conditioning is gone. Completely. I'm still not sure what to make of that.
It may take me a while to write this email. Charles has decided I need to fall asleep anytime I get overly emotional or stressed; apparently there was enough psionic damage when the conditioning broke that he thinks that's best for now. It's frustrating. It's like I can't really face what happened, because as soon as I try, I fall asleep. This is why I thought I might try telling you over email. At least then I can stop and start, and you can miss all the intervening naps.
They kidnapped Moira to get me to trade myself for her. We got her out okay, but they triggered my conditioning and I don't really remember what happened after that. Not until I woke up. I've been told it was in Calgary, but I was really unclear about what was going on. They'd drugged me, sedatives and pre-conditioning drugs, and all I could think of was getting away. I did for a while. But there were too many of them... and that was actually my first nap. I think I'm doing well.
I don't remember much else after they took me down the second time. There are some bits and pieces from being back at Mistra, but it's all.... second nap. I'm not supposed to be fighting with the posthypnotic suggestion like that. I think that's the worst of it, what happened there when they went back into my mind. Although being sent back out to kill Charles was bad. Fighting Pete was bad. In fact, most of it was bad... third nap.
Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. I'm not supposed to be fighting the posthypnotic suggestion this hard. Makes me feel all disconnected again, when I try, and I'm having enough trouble remembering that this is real, and I'm not going to wake up back there. I think I really need to talk, though... if I can talk without passing out. I'll have to ask Charles about that.
Nathan
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