Two more emails

[x-cypher.livejournal.com]

To: Dane, Lorna
From: Ramsey, Doug
Subject: A proposition

Lorna-

You up for a little prank on my dear old roomie? I owe him for that little filter on my journal system, not to mention certain insinuations about someone that I am just friends with.

Anyways, as sort of an apology for all the crap that happened to you on my account (I know it wasn't my fault, still I feel vaguely guilty)...I am going to give you something I remember you expressing a desire to see a while back.

Jamie Madrox. In drag.

Here's the plan. With Miles and Artie off with Em and Sir Growls-a-lot, we can slowly move my clothes, as well as theirs, out of the room over the next day or two. Then, in the morning when Jamie takes his shower, I abscond with the drawers from his dresser, and you whisk his hanging clothes across the hall(have slowly replaced his plastic hangers with metal ones in preparation). Then, we leave him a very fetching dress to change into.

And just in case he should feel a desire to wander out and about in a towel rather than wear the provided wardrobe, I have taken the precaution of lining his bath towel with metallic thread. The moment we hear him cursing, you take the towel too.

Other than that, all we need is a couple digital cameras and a well-thought-out escape plan. Can you think of anything I'm missing?

-Doug


To: [Angie]
From: [Doug]
Subject: Your emails and stuff...

Angie-

Just got your emails due to that filter.

...

Okay, I'm not really _that_ mad at you guys, especially after Jamie and Kitty brought home a few truths. Just...I'm mostly mad at Jamie for his reading the email from Em. I'd probably not even be mad if it weren't for that. But anyways, I'm not really mad at you, because I understand why you did it. I remember where I was, and what you had to go through to get me out of it. And don't think I'm not incredibly grateful to you for it. You're amazing.

Other than that, I haven't worried. Much. Okay, I have worried a little bit, because of what happened right before you left, but if you say it's better, I trust you.

The fact that I'm going to double-check with Jubes and 'Rice is none of your business. ;-)

Hope all is well in Europe, and that you're having a good time with your parents.

Oh, and Jamie is making insinuations. Can I hit _him_ with socks? Or maybe I'll just count it in with my dastardly revenge. >:->

Love,
Doug

Comments

[x-cypher.livejournal.com]

To: [Mistress of Metallurgy]
From: [The Mutant Universal Translator]
Subject: Our evil plot

Lorna-

Yes. I'm devious. The Males of the Mansion Drag Show will not include me. And I don't know that I have enough brass to pose for a swimsuit calendar, assuming you meant me. I _might_ be persuaded to bring out the Infamous Leather Pants for the cause. If persuaded correctly.

As regards the evil plan, will keep that in mind. You realize that, regardless of planning, he may find a way around it? This is the self-proclaimed Clown Prince of Kansas, after all. He just might be more devious than me.

And math trouble? What math trouble? And yes, _just_ friends.

-Doug

[x-polarisstar.livejournal.com]

To: Ramsey, Doug
From: Dane, Lorna
Subject: RE: Our evil plot

Doug,

Hmm, speed seems to be of the essence, doesn't it? He can't beat what he can't catch. See if you can't casually suggest that he and Kitty go bowling or something that way you know he'll be out of the house to de-clothes the room.

I've actually got a green dress that should fit. It's much too big for me.

Men of the Mansion Calender line-up...actually Ali and I talked about that once. It was before the Infamous Leather Pants so we might have to rework it.

We could make you January. I'll bet Marie-Ange could persuade you.

Just basic arithmatic. 2+2=6, you know.

--Lorna

[x-cypher.livejournal.com]

To: [Evil Plotter Number Two]
From: [Evil Plotter Number One]
Subject: Hm...

Lorna-

Hm. The thing is, Jamie can be paranoid as hell. I think he'd notice the missing clothing. I think we're better off with the shower idea. You think we might need an extra pair of hands? I'm sure The Devil Woman could be persuaded to help.

Me? January. Maybe. And...yeah, she probably could.

Um. How does 2 and 2 make 6?

-Doug

[x-polarisstar.livejournal.com]

To: Ramsey, Doug
From: Dane, Lorna
Subject: You're the brains of this outfit

I'm just the muscle, as it were. By all means, let's draft Alison. She's got a wicked sense of humor too.

Right, January it is then. I'll make a note of it.

It just does. Trust me. It's one of those math problems best solved by a clue by four to the head.

Of course, if you'd like outside verification of my math, ask Jamie, Kitty, Alex or Alison. *nods* They're all math experts.

--Lorna

[x-cypher.livejournal.com]

To: [Evil Lackey]
From: [Evil Mastermind]
Subject: Reinforcements

Right, will tell Alison.

Re: January: *whimper*

Clue by four? You're going to have to spell it out for me, I think.

-Doug

[x-polarisstar.livejournal.com]

To: Ramsey, Doug
From: Dane, Lorna
Subject: RE: Reinforcements

Yeah, January. It'll be fabulous. A total night club scene.

Spelling it out ruins my fun! I'd rather just tease you until you get it yourselves.

--Lorna

[x-cypher.livejournal.com]

To: Dane, Lorna
From: Ramsey, Doug

I hate you all. *goes and hides and blushes furiously*

What if she doesn't?

*headdesk*

-Doug

[x-polarisstar.livejournal.com]

To: Ramsey, Doug
From: Dane, Lorna

It'll be hot, trust me. 13 year olds everywhere will swoon. *nods*

I don't think you have to worry about her not getting it. She's better at math than you are. *grins*

--Lorna

[x-polarisstar.livejournal.com]

To: Ramsey, Doug
From: Dane, Lorna

Okay, what's with all the blushing and why am I supposed to hit you with a sock?

--Lorna