Emails to Nathan, Jean and Betsy.

[x-madelyn.livejournal.com]

To: [nathan], [jean]
From: [maddie]



Jean already knows most of this, given she spent a hell of a lot of time in my head earlier this week, but I owe you both an apology for the way I've been reacting to you both since Betsy's mystery virus. To put it plainly, and in Jamie-speak - I was having a wiggins. A major one. Telepathy-related - basically what happened with Betsy, being trapped in her mind like that, it exacerbated the usual fears about telepathy and made me more than a little twitchy about things. And given I was needed to help Haroun, I did my usual thing and shunted aside the issue until there was time to deal with it.

That time is now.

The link Jean made for Haroun's surgery has done a lot to help me adjust. Being linked with Hank showed me some advantages I hadn't thought of. *blushes* So I won't be fleeing from you guys like I have been. I'd like to talk things out, if possible, but I understand if it isn't. And once again, I'm so very sorry for giving you both the cold shoulder these past weeks.

Maddie.



To: [betsy]
From: [maddie]



And in true me fashion, I've waited until the medical emergency is over before dealing with them. Which isn't always the best thing.

What happened, with your virus, when you pulled Remy and I into your mind like that... I know you didn't mean to do it, but it still freaked me the hell out. To the point I've been avoiding anyone with telepathy as much as possible, and you most of all. Intellectually I know you had no control of your powers, but I felt so helpless, so vulnerable. That scared me, Betsy, being unable to do anything or even understand at first what was going on. More than the thought of being stuck with Le Beau for all eternity. *wry*

Now things are under control, I'm letting myself deal with things again. Can we talk this over? I know you're busy with things, so email's fine. *blushes* It's probably better, in fact. Less chance of me turning and fleeing.

I'm so sorry, Betsy. I want to deal with this, I really do.

Maddie.

Comments

Reply to Maddie

[x-jeangrey.livejournal.com]

I think talking can be arranged, yes. I figured I'd give you space until a) you were ready to deal with it and b) we'd both slept. I'm a big fan of the sleeping thing.

I'll come by soon, and we can talk. Possibly also with food?

-Jean

Reply to Jean

[x-madelyn.livejournal.com]

Oh, indeed a fan of the sleeping. I haven't slept this much since... well, since the last big emergency ended. *wry*

Also a big fan of food. I'll put the coffee on.

Maddie.

Reply to Maddie

[x-jeangrey.livejournal.com]

Then clearly I'm the one providing the pastries. Danishes this time, I think.

-Jean

Subject: I'd wondered...

[x-cable.livejournal.com]

When you did that last EEG of mine, I was definitely getting the impression that you wanted me away from you as soon as possible. This explains a lot.

Of course we can talk it out, but the person you really ought to talk to is Charles, not just Jean and I. Bite the bullet and go have some tea - he's probably the best person to help you sort out both the usual and unusual fears about telepathy.

Nathan

Subject: There's been tea.

[x-madelyn.livejournal.com]

To: [nathan]
From: [maddie]

Whole potfuls, in fact. *wry* Part of the reason why the email now - I've been talking with Charles, sorting things out in my head enough to do the approach and grovel.

I am really sorry for the way I've been acting. Fear isn't rational, even when you're stomping on it with responsibility.

Maddie.

Subject: well, good...

[x-cable.livejournal.com]

Tea does a body good. Or something like that.

And Maddie, stop apologizing, okay? You're allowed to have been unsettled by something like that. It's perfectly natural, and you certainly don't need to grovel. Besides, any psi is to some extent used to it, even from other mutants.

Just promise not to glare at me during my next EEG and we'll call it even?

Nate

Subject: Not using that word again...

[x-madelyn.livejournal.com]

To: [nathan]
From: [maddie]

Just because it happens all the time and you're used to it doesn't make it right. *sighs* But I'll stop apologising. It's just letting my personal issues get in the way of my job... glaring at you over the EEG wasn't terribly professional. Then again, neither was the tranq gun incident and Scott's coffee. I seem to have these weird reactions when I'm sleep deprived.

No more glaring, I promise. Well, not unless it's deserved. *grins*

Maddie.

Subject: fair enough...

[x-cable.livejournal.com]

There were good reasons for the tranq gun and Scott's coffee. Last fall was... not the most logical time in the world. I think the multiple demonic invasions were a clue. But we all came through it just fine. So, no second-guessing, all right?

In any case, I imagine I will do something that gets me glared at before too long. I do have something of a track record on that score.

While I've got you - Moira's immured in the lab again so I don't want to disturb her, but I was wondering if you could scare up something a little stronger in the way of painkillers for me. Something that doesn't knock me out, if at all possible. Looks like I'm heading to India this weekend and I don't want either the pain or the painkillers messing with my judgement.

Nate

Subject: Not using the other words either. The ones that start with "P" and "B".

[x-madelyn.livejournal.com]

To: [nathan]
From: [maddie]

No second guessing? You take all the fun out of meaningless angst. *grins*

And don't you dare do something glare-worthy before the end of the month. I'm getting frown lines. :P

Come on down and we'll see what we can find. I'm going over your charts now... the notes on how well those potions of Amanda'a work on you gives me an idea for something more aspirin-based than usual. Willowbark's just raw aspirin, after all. We'll just need to watch your kidney function - drinking plenty of water is always a good thing.

How're things healing up? I haven't really seen you since the incident. I see Moira's noted the ribs are still giving you trouble...

Maddie.

Subject: be down shortly...

[x-cable.livejournal.com]

Trying to get visas in order here before I worry about plane tickets. Traveling to Kashmir on such short notice is something of a pain in the ass.

And I'm not planning anything, Maddie, but then, I never do, do I? It just sort of happens. Repeatedly.

I would have made a point of coming down before I left anyway. The ribs are definitely not healing up very well, and Moira made me promise to check in if that was the case. Everything else seems to be doing all right, though. I guess the genes from the paternal side are good for something.

Nate

Repy to Maddie

[x-psylocke.livejournal.com]

To be perfectly honest, I sort of figured. And before your email here, I was very much inclined to giving you the space you needed. Look, I don't mean to be abrupt about what happened but I don't want to watch my step with you, Maddie. We've both had quite enough to handle since everything went into the shitter and I'd rather not be the reason you can't focus on your duties with a telepath about.

Am not so sure what to say here but what feels honest. So, here's a go at honesty.....

Maddie, I love you dearly but if you continue with the stupid, I may have to slap you.

Betsy

Repy to Betsy

[x-madelyn.livejournal.com]

No more stupid. Or at least, not so much. I'm working on it. No slapping necessary. Besides, the boys would get far too excited over the idea of us fighting. *g* They'll start suggesting things like oils or jelly...

And you're not stopping me from doing my job. The whole reason I haven't mentioned it until now is because I was doing my job and doing that nifty deferral trick I'm so good at. Now I'm not needed on deck quite so much, it's time to stop doing that. But regardless, this whole thing is not your fault, it's my reaction to what happened. So you're no more the reason for this than Nathan or Jean or Charles.

When you're back from wherever it is you are right now, and the medlab's mostly-empty, how about we go down to Harry's and hash this out over beer and whatever fruity drink you're having?

Maddie.

Reply to Maddie

[x-psylocke.livejournal.com]

Please, no more visual aids. I think that one will hold me over for some time.

But I was the cause that triggered it all and that doesn't sit well with me. I'm trying to keep it all in perspective but with the way things have been lately.....

When I can pry myself from these consoles, I'll let you know.

~B

p.s. If you mentioned fruity and my drink in the same haphazard way again, you may well regret it.