Email to Kyle

[x-forge.livejournal.com]

To: [Cowardly Lion]
From: [Tin Man]
Subject: Off the map?

Dude.

So, I went by your room last night to see if you were up for some HORSE, but you weren't there and Julio was studying so I didn't want to bother him. And you weren't in the Danger Room, and it's pretty cold out so I didn't think you were out doing the tree thing. You haven't been going out and beating people up without telling me again, are you?

JHF

Comments

[x-forge.livejournal.com]

To: [Moose]
From: [Not a Squirrel]
Subject: I should be asking you, apparently!

Wait, what? Clarice? Like, our purple pixie Clarice?

Since when? What else have I missed? Did we get invaded? Has it been raining puppies? Am I on fire? When did this happen?

[x-wildchild.livejournal.com]

To: (Rocket J. Squirrel?)
From: (Totally Bullwinkel)
Subject: I don't need a map.

No, Clarice the Russian fish-seller I met on my globe-trotting publicity tour. YES, our Clarice, you tool.

Since after Halloween? I figured I was done not asking people out and being a chickenshit and she's cute and fun. And oh my GOD dude. I mean, dude. Hello Kitty. All I'm sayin. Nothing for little kids should be on women's underwear but I am so OH MY GOD not complaining.

Do you want the rest of the gossip since you've been off being all Oh hai I can drink legally now? Marius is still trying to sleep with every girl in New York City, his sister's still kind of bitchy but hot, Julio got glasses, Shiro caught the gay, Kevin caught the gay (from Jay), Logan left for Canada, Garrison came back from Canada, the only thing we got invaded by was stupid, Kurt got a puppy and I hope not because dude, burning hair stinks like ass.

And I need the shop vac. Shamu's shedding.

[x-forge.livejournal.com]

To: [Bull-something]
From: [Rockets may be involved]
Subject: re: mapping

Wait, it's the underwear-viewing type of thing? Wow. I really have not been paying attention. Dude. I mean, dude. Go you.

Clarice. Wow. Way to go. I feel like a bit of a tool for not having noticed.

I'm pretty sure I was aware of the rest, although I'm not sure you can 'catch the gay'.

Still, Clarice? Dude.

JHF

[x-wildchild.livejournal.com]

To: (Boris?)
From: (I sure as hell ain't Natasha)
Subject: re: re: mapping

Oh yeah, it's totally go team Kyle. (It is NOT go team Packers, since they lost to the godddamn Giants. Farking kicker couldn't shank the ball three times in a row. Eff that.)

I know you can't catch the gay, but it's funnier to tell it that way.

Clarice. Dude.

[x-forge.livejournal.com]

To: [Sherman]
From: [Mr. Peabody]
Subject: We've gone from maps to GPS now.

So, Hello Kitty underwear, eh?

Okay, to hell with email, we're going for burgers. Grab your coat.

JHF