E-Mail to Nori

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: Nori
From: Kevin
Subject: Hey! You DO exist!

I just figured I'd say hi. I've been doing the work thing and the recluse thing and I haven't actually seen you around much. Figure since I'm at the stupid computer at the moment I might as well use it to say hi, right?

-kevin

Comments

[x-kaminari.livejournal.com]

To: [Kevin]
From: [Nori]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

~Translated from Japanese~

Of course I exist. I haven't gone anywhere just cause you're too busy and all whatever to hang out with me. (>_<)

So, what's this about you going to the dance with a girl?

-Nori

~Translated from Japanese~

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Nori]
From: [Kevin]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

Pfft, don't try it. You know where to find me and if you were feeling that neglected I'd have gotten something thrown at my head and dragged off by you by now. But we should hang out 'cause of the neglect and all.

Jay works Friday nights. He works every Friday night. I didn't know he'd taken it off and I wouldn't even go to prom normally anyway. But I never got to even consider not going to mine because I was at Muir and Cessily wants to go but she doesn't know anyone but me and her roommates so far. So she asked if I'd go and I said I would after clarifying the whole having a boyfriend thing so we were both on the same "friends only" page. I didn't think it was a big deal, just a prom, right?

-Kevin

[x-kaminari.livejournal.com]

To: [Kevin]
From: [Nori]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

~Translated from Japanese~

I've been too distracted to throw things at your head, although next time you vanish into your little doom cloud I'm totally going to now that you've admitted you expect that sort of thing from me. I'm just living down to your expectations, and trust me, I know all about that.

So, ok, maybe I still don't really get this whole prom thing, cause we don't do it in Japan, but Jennie says it's kind of a big deal after Julio asked me. Plus, really, it's super hard for guys and girls to just be friends. I mean, there's way more of it here than home, but if you told me you were going to a thing with a girl? I'd assume you were dating. Everybody would assume you were dating. And this is like, a thing you go to with the person you're dating.

Which is not to say that I think Jay's not wrong. He's totally wrong.

-Nori

~Translated from Japanese~

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Nori]
From: [Kevin]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

Well as long as you're just living down to my expectations! What's distracting you? Julio maybe? (Way to take advantage of a guy when he's stuck in verse, by the way. Such a chick move.)

I don't know, a lot of people make a huge deal of prom. There's this thing where people assume you go with your high school sweetheart and you lose your virginity to each other in a hotel room after and spend the night getting trashed with the rest of the graduating class. Only most people don't still have their virginity when they're 18 so the whole ideal is kind of shot. Really it's this girl dream of an insanely romantic night while guys figure they're definitely getting laid because all girls expect they're putting out on prom night. Only a lot of people go with friends or go alone because it's not a big, romantic deal for the most part anymore. It's just an excuse for people to get dressed up and waste money on a limo and dinner and whatever else.

Thing is, everyone knows I'm dating Jay. Everyone. He saw to that, intentionally or not. Most of my friends are girls, which is just how it happened. What am I supposed to do about that? He gets all upset if I joke around with one of them when I am in a good mood. If he took someone who I knew he was friends with, who I knew he'd hung out with then I wouldn't care. Not to mention, Jay and I aren't students. We're both graduated already. Prom is for students so it's not like I would have gone with him because why would I, as someone who is in no way a student, ask someone else who isn't a student to go? Doesn't make sense to me.

-Kevin

[x-kaminari.livejournal.com]

To: [Kevin]
From: [Nori]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

~Translated from Japanese~

Oh yeah, Julio's definitely part of it, and trying not to fail (I got, like, a ten minute lecture, which, whatever, I've been yelled at by scarier teachers than the people here but what the shit is this, they said they were actually going to hold me back!) and then there's powers shit. I almost never run into the wall anymore, which is a nice improvement cause I was ending up all kinds of bruised and as fun as getting Julio to 'kiss and make them better' is, not getting them in the first place is way less painful. And it wasn't taking advantage! Or, well, it totally was but you're not going to hear him complaining anytime soon.

And now I'm convinced you Americans are dumber than ever. Just saying. Although all of that sounds way more likely in some ways than the romantic thing. But I'm just gonna throw this out there: Jay's crazy. I mean, he's not nuts on par with me, but he's pretty damn crazy, especially if he didn't say he wanted to go and you guys aren't students or whatever. But, of the two of you? He's totally the girl. If prom's all about the girl's romantic dream...

-Nori

~Translated from Japanese~

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Nori]
From: [Kevin]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

Dude, are you serious? What class are you failing? Or is it classes? That blows. I wasn't that great with the school thing but I pulled C's pretty easily, B's when I felt like putting in effort. I used to get the lecture about how I could get A's only I never cared that much about it. Congrats on not running into walls, though. And I'm just not going to think about where Julio is kissing or why, okay? It saves my mental eye some vivid images I don't need to experience.

Wow. Just wow. Yeah, Jay's kind of crazy. A lot of the time he's great. And sometimes he's kind of...emotional. Yeah, that's the safest way of putting it. I mean, he didn't say anything to me about it until today and again I point out we're not students. Cess is a sophomore so it's her dance to go to, y'know? Was I just really stupid for agreeing to basically do a friend a favor by going with her so she could go?

Also? Americans are insanely stupid. Being from the South I feel I earn the right to say that.

-Kevin

[x-kaminari.livejournal.com]

To: [Kevin]
From: [Nori]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

~Translated from Japanese~

Classes. Like, all of them. Well, not powers training, cause there's no grade (which is totally a shame cause if there is, the one I'd be getting, like, a 2-mark. Maybe even a 1.) And not gym, because I'm kind of a lot better at class I don't have to sit still in and, since I actually started going to class and, like, turning in the work I'm doing ok in math, cause it's kind of the same even in English. But I'm failing English (I know, there's a shocker, right?) and geography and history and science.

Kevin, I hate to break this to you, but your boyfriend is a total girl. He's not even a sort of fun, cool to hang around with girl. He's the other kind who gets all clingy and doesn't want you talking to other girls. Which is totally his problem, not yours, and you should go to the dance w/ Cessily, because she asked and whatever, it's not like it means anything, since you date guys anyway.

You know that everytime you mention being from the south I totally think of the hicks in Okinawa, right?

-Nori

~Translated from Japanese~

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Nori]
From: [Kevin]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

Jesus. Well, I'm pretty good with science and actually good at English (I'm sure the whole native language, sorta, helps). If you need help, and if it'll do you any good at this point, I could help you out with those classes. If you told me way before the end of the year almost I'd have offered then too. Way go on the failing. Can you succeed at failing 'cause I think if you're failing across the board that's almost a success in a way.

We've gone over the whole he's the only guy I've ever liked and otherwise I've only ever liked girls thing, right? But, you're right. I date guys, I've been entirely faithful to Jay and there's no reason why he should ALWAYS flip out and act like I'm about to cheat on him when I'm not. It is his issue and I thought guys were more simple than girls, who are all nuts?

I have no idea what hicks in Okinawa are like but now I'm picturing chubby, dirty Japanese people wearing a red plaid flannel shirt under overalls with a shotgun and chewing tobacco.

-Kevin

[x-kaminari.livejournal.com]

To: [Kevin]
From: [Nori]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

~Translated from Japanese~

It's maybe not entirely too late for this year in English, since Crystal's been giving me extra tutoring and, you know, actually making me hand in my homework, and maybe science if you can help some? I'm pretty much doomed to taking summer classes for geography and history, I think. Also, the hell you all get a three month break? If somebody'd told me that, like, four months ago there would have been way less unpleasantness.

Well, maybe some.

You've mentioned it, but I continue to just assume you're talking crazy-talk because it makes no sense to me. Although it does support my "Jay is a girl" theory. And guys are simpler than girls, but only if they're getting regular sex. Calms their brains down. Without it they spend vast quantities of mental energy contemplating sex and trying to figure out how to get more, and it makes them crazier.

Japan is more enlightened than America; we don't have guns.

It's, like, almost two in the morning. I don't think tonight is going to be a sleep night.

You know what we haven't done in ages and ages and ages because you are lame and FORGOT about me? KFC. I require chicken; you're driving. Also, paying.

-Nori

~Translated from Japanese~

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Nori]
From: [Kevin]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

Sure. Laurie helps me practice meditating in the evenings but I could come find you after that and if you're not distracted by Julio or something else valid help you until the end of the year? Do you guys not get three month breaks?

I swear it's not crazy talk. I see this giant implosion of me and Jay on the horizon, have for a while actually and some time after that I might even prove to you that I like girls. Or, you know, maybe I already have since Jay has been put firmly in the girl box. Gross, not the way my brain just thought of it. I think you just pegged why I'm insane half the time though.

A lot of countries with really strict gun laws also have higher violent crime rates. Americans love our guns and Southerners really love our guns. Just look at the stereotypes!

Sleep's overrated.

Am I driving right now?! I don't mind the paying. It's like borrowing a girlfriend. Only with any of the actual perks girlfriends give you. But I'm dating Jay so it's not that different.

You tell NO ONE I just said that.

-kevin

[x-kaminari.livejournal.com]

To: [Kevin]
From: [Nori]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

~Translated from Japanese~

Yeah, that would work for me; I'll try not to be distracted and/or crawling up the wall too often. Thanks, Kevin. (And no, we don't, summer break's only a month and I'd still end up at school at least three times a week, for club practice or class or sports festival prep...)

See, three months ago and I'd totally have taken you up on the 'proving you like girls' thing, but Julio'd probably disapprove. Kind of nice having a boyfriend who'd disapprove, actually. But yes, I think Jay's more a count in the dating girls court than the other. And be glad you're only crazy half the time?

Ahahahah! I promise nothing. Poor Kevin. No perks from anybody. Because you are, in fact, driving right now. Meet you in the garage.

-Nori

~Translated from Japanese~

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Nori]
From: [Kevin]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

No problem. It's what friends are for. Just don't tell Jay so he doesn't think you and I are cheating on him and Julio with each other! (You people suck at not making kids loathe school, clearly.)

I didn't mean it exactly like that. Okay kind of like that but not necessarily with you. Don't get me wrong, if I wasn't dating a crazy girl and you weren't dating someone I actually like as a human being then I might suggest otherwise. I'm glad he'd disapprove, for the record. You're a crazy, crazy female but you're my friend and I'd be forced to take it personally if he didn't disapprove of you being with someone else while technically with him.

I'm only crazy on the OUTSIDE half the time.

God, I suck. One day I am determined to get perks. Stupid death touch thing.

Hurry your ass up. Just 'cause you're hot doesn't mean I'm waiting forever!

-Kevin

[x-kaminari.livejournal.com]

To: [Kevin]
From: [Nori]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

-Translated from Japanese-

Ok, really now, I wasn't going to wait for you to reply last night. You were the slow one! And not just cause I can sprint at 75 kph, either.

(No, we don't, because Japanese school is a lot more fun than American school. I really miss my club activities and the festivals and everything.)

Also, Kevin, has it not occurred to you that latex is synthetic? Perks should be totally doable. I mean, maybe not full on sex because that requires a fairly high level of naked, but why is your crazy girl of a boyfriend not giving you regular blowjobs?

-Nori

-Translated from Japanese-

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Nori]
From: [Kevin]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

I had stuff going on! Kind of insane stuff that I was trying to deal with and it was kind of doing my head in. And part of that was being told by my girl!boyfriend's best friend that I'm a shitty boyfriend and she's going to encourage him to break up with me. Fun!

(Plus it has Japanese girls in those uniforms and you really can't go wrong there...maybe I should move to Japan)

Yeah fairly high level of naked unless I want to cover myself with latex which I don't think I'm kinky enough for really. I don't know, maybe my crazy girl of a boyfriend is more concerned with being able to get off than getting me off. It's one of those things almost never talked about but always there and it only ever gets talked about when I get pissed off about something and go off about how I can't easily do x, y, or z that I want to, y'know?

-Kevin

[x-kaminari.livejournal.com]

To: [Kevin]
From: [Nori]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

~Translated from Japanese~

Seriously, I have yet to find a guy who doesn't think the uniform's hot. Which is kind of creepy when you get down to it, but whatever.

And this, I take it, would be one of the reasons you're seeing an impending explosion?

-Nori

~Translated from Japanese~

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Nori]
From: [Kevin]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

Creepy? It's not creepy. The uniform is hot. I think it's 'cause you think of how well behaved schoolgirls are and...okay so it's creepy. But it's still hot.

The fact that stuff builds up and up and up until he finally says something is why I see an impending explosion. Most stuff doesn't really bother me. I could bring it up or not and it wouldn't matter much because most stuff I just let go. If it's really important I'll say something but to be honest most stuff that isn't related to "Don't do that unless you don't want your hand" isn't that important. he's just frustrating because I do all this stuff that apparently upsets him or annoys him or frustrates him and he doesn't say anything forever. Like he gets all upset if I'm not around but I've never been around. But then he doesn't say anything until WEEKS later. So what am I supposed to do? Just like dating a girl...

-Kevin

[x-kaminari.livejournal.com]

To: [Kevin]
From: [Nori]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

~Translated from Japanese~

It's particularly creepy if you've been the girl in the uniform. Trust me.

And yes, that is exactly like dating a girl. At least, if you have the misfortune to not be dating one with my brand of crazy. You just need to date someone willing to throw things at your head when you're being oblivious.

-Nori

~Translated from Japanese~

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Nori]
From: [Kevin]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

Luckily I will never have that problem since I'm not a girl and I don't wear skirts. Even if I'm in a weird enough mood to get Laurie to give me braided pigtails for prom.

I hate to say this, but yes. Yes I need to date someone who will throw things at my head when I'm oblivious. Or make giant signs and leave them on my door. Or, you know, not get all over emotional over stupid stuff maybe.

-Kevin

[x-kaminari.livejournal.com]

To: [Kevin]
From: [Nori]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

~Translated from Japanese~

Just as well. You'd look pretty fucking stupid in my school uniform.

Or all of the above? You're way too oblivious for somebody who's not direct enough.

-Nori

~Translated from Japanese~

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Nori]
From: [Kevin]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

Are you saying I'd be a bad drag queen? I think the hairy legs would work against me. And, you know, having muscle tone.

Hey! Okay, you have a point.

-Kevin

[x-kaminari.livejournal.com]

To: [Kevin]
From: [Nori]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

~Translated from Japanese~

So, what you're saying here is that I'm right, and I'm right. This is sensible, because I'm always right.

-Nori

~Translated from Japanese~

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Nori]
From: [Kevin]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

Clearly the world is about to end.

-Kevin

[x-kaminari.livejournal.com]

To: [Kevin]
From: [Nori]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

~Translated from Japanese~

You know what that right there is?

Justification for me to throw something at your head. I'd duck if I were you.

-Nori

~Translated from Japanese~

[x-wither.livejournal.com]

To: [Nori]
From: [Kevin]
Subject: Re: Hey! You DO exist!

I'll be hiding now.

If you hold onto the urge to throw things at me tonight just try not to hit Cessily instead.

-Kevin